My friend Cheryl wrote this post. It is funny that she would write this at the same time that I have been thinking something similar, yet different.
I grew up in California, in the Bay Area. My parents had joined the LDS faith several years before I was born and we were raised as active members of our church. I grew up knowing right from wrong and had a strong belief in God. In California however, if you were LDS you were the minority. Being "mormon" (as LDS people are also known by) wasn't cool....it was hard. You had to really believe. People were watching you and judging you and waiting for you to make a mistake.
Sad to say I made lots of "mistakes" growing up! I had a testimony of the gospel, however, I was more concerned with friends, or maybe the lack thereof and so what happened...I got caught up with the wrong group of kids. And started doing a lot of wrong things. My parents tried their best to raise me the right way, and they did love me and wanted to best for me, but I was the rebellious one. I did a lot of things that I shouldn't have done...and it took me a while to realize that and to want to change. But I did have the desire to change. I just didn't know how to do it on my own.
Funny thing happened...my parents decided to leave California and move to Utah, and not just any place in Utah, but to Utah Valley, or as it is sometimes known, Happy Valley! I thought I would die at first. I remember growing up and hearing all about the "Utah Mormons" and how they are so different from the "real ones" who live outside of Utah. Well...Pleasant Grove Utah was a shocker to me. Puffy hair, penny loafers, people saying "oh my heck", and all the other stereotype comments and looks. And every one was so nice...always smiling, laughing, helping one another, etc. It was unbelievable. I would have never believed it had I not seen it with my own eyes.
Moving to Utah was the best thing that could have ever happened to me at the point in my life. I had the change to start over. Don't get me wrong, I wasn't robbing banks, or things like that, just dumb stuff that kids do. But I could repent in private and start fresh. How thankful I am for that fresh start and for the people that became my friends. I dated some nice boys and had good wholesome fun. YSA activities and dances, etc.
My parents use to say that they moved to Utah to save my soul. They might have been joking about it, but it is the truth. It was a fresh start for me. One that I needed.
I ended up going on an LDS mission to Italy, I met a wonderful man and we were married in the temple. We have two wonderful children and one of them is now serving a mission. We may not be rich, probably never will be...but we are happy. We are slowly realizing what is really important in life. Our family, our children, our testimonies of the gospel of Jesus Christ.
I guess I have thought a lot about this over the past few days because of the vacation that we are on right now. We spent a day in St. George to go to the Tuacahn, and while there we went to the St. George temple and the visitor's center. It was a wonderful experience there. I am so glad that we stopped. We saw a presentation on families and how important they are to the plan of our Father in Heaven. Also about how families can be together forever. It is something that I have known forever and have always believed in...but it was so nice to just have a reminder and to feel the spirit bear witness again of the truths that we know.
After living in Italy for several years and then moving back to Utah I remember thinking I would never live in Happy Valley. Yet, we moved here in 1999 and have no intention of moving.
Sometimes it has been hard. Sometimes our views are a bit different then the average LDS person. We might teach or expose our children to things that other families don't approve or agree with. We are open in our discussions and views towards certain topics. Sometimes it has been hard to be considered the "outcast". And that is how I have felt at times. But I realize better now what it is.
People do have these "bubbles" around them, like my friend Cheryl wrote about. People protect themselves from what is different or what they don't understand, and when we are in a comfort zone we don't choose to look any further. And that is sad. I feel that the only way that we can really learn about different things and to be more accepting is to learn and expose and understand. We don't have to agree or live in a way that isn't in accordance with our beliefs, however, we need to learn to accept and understand the differences that we all have.
We have been in Las Vegas for a few days now. There is diversity here. But you know what the great thing is...my son isn't shocked by it. He understands that people are different and he is okay with that. Because he knows who he is and what he believes. But he knows that each one of us, no matter who we are is a child of God, and valuable to our heavenly father.
We live in a bubble in Utah, and I love that bubble...especially because as parents we have been able to modify that bubble to fit our family life. It has also been a way to teach our children to be tolerant of others that are the "same as them, not just of those that are different or don't believe the same or act the same."
I guess what I'm trying to say here is...I love Utah and the bubble that I live it, but I'm also thankful to modify it to fit my family, and to leave it once in a while as well. It makes me appreciate it even more when I get home.
June 27, 2011
June 14, 2011
I HAVEN'T WRITTEN FOR A WHILE
Wow...I've let this blogging thing go for a while. I guess because I haven't had to many exciting things going on.
Summer is trying to arrive. We have had some really nice days and Brian and his friends have gone to the water park or to friends homes to swim. They have "hung out" at night playing "night games" or just walking the neighborhood and "chillin" as he says.
He is reaching that age where friends are becoming much more important to him. I must admit that it is hard to see him grow up. I miss having a little one in the house. However, it is so nice to see him grow into a fine young man.
Giovanni and I are so proud of him. He has good friends and makes good choices. He is obedient and kind. And he has such a good heart and strong spirit.
This summer we are doing the "school thing" a bit different then years past. Every week we make out a schedule of what he will be doing. There is reading everyday, journal writing 2x a week, language (Spanish for school, and Italian for family and fun), science, math, history, and other that is divided through the week. We bought a really cool computer program and he seems to enjoy it. He also has to do 10 min of personal scripture reading, as well as family reading at night. We weren't to sure how this would go over...but he has done a fantastic job!! And he doesn't complain at all.
We usually have not been the type of family do to allowance...we have just figured, you live here and you help make the mess so you can help clean it as well. But again...trying something new. He has the "regular chores" of making his bed and picking up his room, empty the dishwasher, and garbage. But...we thought it was time to mix things up...so Monday is "chore" day. He has to clean his bathroom, dust his room and Robert's room, vacum upstairs and down stairs and a few other things. We told him we would pay him $7.50 and hour for his chores with the option of earning an additional 10% if he had a good attitude while doing them, and through out the week. And I'll be darned if he hasn't done fantabulous!!! Way to go Brian!! We are proud of you! Keep it up! We have never really been ones to give a lot of chores in our home. One because the house isn't that big and no real yard work to do because of the HOA and also because we figure that the boys will grow up soon enough and have so much responsibility that we want them to enjoy this part of their lives to the fullest. Now...I know that everyone has a different opinion on chores, etc...and that is fine, this is just the choice for our family, and it works.
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For the past 3 weeks Brian has been going to basketball camp at the high school. It is 3x a week for 3 weeks and 2-3 hours a day. He is really hoping to make the jr high team and is really working hard for this. We ran into a small conflict - Scout Camp. Brian LOVES the Young Men's program in our ward. He just doesn't like earning the merit badges and the scouting side of it. I respect the fact that he is honest about it and shares with us his feelings about it. He says he'll do it a YM, but on his own, he really doesn't care to much about it. So...we let him make a choice between basketball and camp.
Again, for some families this might work, for others maybe not...each must choose for themselves. So in the end Brian decided (with a small incentive on our part -thanks Clark for the suggestion) that he will go on Wednesday after basketball is done and stay there until Saturday with his troop. He went last year and had a good time...so it isn't like he has never been before.
Someone at church made the comment that they knew how the "Bona boys" felt about scouts because they remembered how Robert was. Hey...Robert was great...No he didn't get his Eagle, but that is all that he didn't do. It had to be his choice and he chose not to. As parents we need to pick and choose our battles so that we can win the war. At the time that the comment was made about "my boys" I was offended and hurt. I actually made some comment in reply about how Robert still turned out great, etc. And I am sure that I could have said something nicer, different, etc...but in that moment I felt like my sons and I were being judged by someone else. However, after thinking about it for a while I have again decided that every person/family has to do what is best for them...and I'm okay now. If Brian doesn't want to do it, then fine. I will highly encourage him to do scouts because of the benefits that he can gain from it...but will I demand it of him...no. And that's my final answer.
-------------------------------------------
A couple of weeks ago my niece's baby, Riley was blessed. He is 3 months old now. and is a cute kid!
Summer is trying to arrive. We have had some really nice days and Brian and his friends have gone to the water park or to friends homes to swim. They have "hung out" at night playing "night games" or just walking the neighborhood and "chillin" as he says.
He is reaching that age where friends are becoming much more important to him. I must admit that it is hard to see him grow up. I miss having a little one in the house. However, it is so nice to see him grow into a fine young man.
Giovanni and I are so proud of him. He has good friends and makes good choices. He is obedient and kind. And he has such a good heart and strong spirit.
This summer we are doing the "school thing" a bit different then years past. Every week we make out a schedule of what he will be doing. There is reading everyday, journal writing 2x a week, language (Spanish for school, and Italian for family and fun), science, math, history, and other that is divided through the week. We bought a really cool computer program and he seems to enjoy it. He also has to do 10 min of personal scripture reading, as well as family reading at night. We weren't to sure how this would go over...but he has done a fantastic job!! And he doesn't complain at all.
We usually have not been the type of family do to allowance...we have just figured, you live here and you help make the mess so you can help clean it as well. But again...trying something new. He has the "regular chores" of making his bed and picking up his room, empty the dishwasher, and garbage. But...we thought it was time to mix things up...so Monday is "chore" day. He has to clean his bathroom, dust his room and Robert's room, vacum upstairs and down stairs and a few other things. We told him we would pay him $7.50 and hour for his chores with the option of earning an additional 10% if he had a good attitude while doing them, and through out the week. And I'll be darned if he hasn't done fantabulous!!! Way to go Brian!! We are proud of you! Keep it up! We have never really been ones to give a lot of chores in our home. One because the house isn't that big and no real yard work to do because of the HOA and also because we figure that the boys will grow up soon enough and have so much responsibility that we want them to enjoy this part of their lives to the fullest. Now...I know that everyone has a different opinion on chores, etc...and that is fine, this is just the choice for our family, and it works.
-------------------------------------------
For the past 3 weeks Brian has been going to basketball camp at the high school. It is 3x a week for 3 weeks and 2-3 hours a day. He is really hoping to make the jr high team and is really working hard for this. We ran into a small conflict - Scout Camp. Brian LOVES the Young Men's program in our ward. He just doesn't like earning the merit badges and the scouting side of it. I respect the fact that he is honest about it and shares with us his feelings about it. He says he'll do it a YM, but on his own, he really doesn't care to much about it. So...we let him make a choice between basketball and camp.
Again, for some families this might work, for others maybe not...each must choose for themselves. So in the end Brian decided (with a small incentive on our part -thanks Clark for the suggestion) that he will go on Wednesday after basketball is done and stay there until Saturday with his troop. He went last year and had a good time...so it isn't like he has never been before.
Someone at church made the comment that they knew how the "Bona boys" felt about scouts because they remembered how Robert was. Hey...Robert was great...No he didn't get his Eagle, but that is all that he didn't do. It had to be his choice and he chose not to. As parents we need to pick and choose our battles so that we can win the war. At the time that the comment was made about "my boys" I was offended and hurt. I actually made some comment in reply about how Robert still turned out great, etc. And I am sure that I could have said something nicer, different, etc...but in that moment I felt like my sons and I were being judged by someone else. However, after thinking about it for a while I have again decided that every person/family has to do what is best for them...and I'm okay now. If Brian doesn't want to do it, then fine. I will highly encourage him to do scouts because of the benefits that he can gain from it...but will I demand it of him...no. And that's my final answer.
-------------------------------------------
A couple of weeks ago my niece's baby, Riley was blessed. He is 3 months old now. and is a cute kid!
Riley and Brian (Cousins)
Riley and Zio Giovanni
Riley and Mom (Cassandra)
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Robert is doing great! Still in Ravenn with Anziano Winegar. They had a leadership training a few weeks ago and he made it to the mission website. You can go here to see him.
June 1, 2011
MEMORIAL DAY
On Monday I went to the cemetery, by myself this year.
As I walked towards her grave site I felt the lump develop in my throat. I turned around and looked the other way for just a few moments. I took in the sight of so many flowers and families. People remembering those who had passed on before and honoring them.
I turned around and continued to walk a little closer.
For once, when I arrived there were already other flowers there. It made my heart skip a beat.
I was so glad to know that others remembered her too, and not just me.
I sat down my white and pink flowers and stood back to take the scene in.
I went back to car and got my phone so take a picture of the sight and to get my sunglasses.
Not because it was sunny...in fact, it was starting to sprinkle, but to hide my eyes. I could feel the tears coming.
I don't cry as much any more. It has been almost 7 years, and the pain is lighter. But there are those moments when I think of her calling Brian a "pill" and commenting on how tall and grown up Robert was becoming. Or when I think of all the phone calls...it least one a day, if not more.
She was my best friend. And I miss her. But I know that she is here with me.
I know that she is proud of my boys and the men they are becoming.
So....I stood there and let the tears roll down my cheeks for a few minutes....I told her I loved her, and turned and walked away because the hurt was just too much that day.
I love you Mom. I miss you! I think about you all the time. I can't wait until the day that I will see you again and I can hug you and tell you that I love you.
As I walked towards her grave site I felt the lump develop in my throat. I turned around and looked the other way for just a few moments. I took in the sight of so many flowers and families. People remembering those who had passed on before and honoring them.
I turned around and continued to walk a little closer.
For once, when I arrived there were already other flowers there. It made my heart skip a beat.
I was so glad to know that others remembered her too, and not just me.
I sat down my white and pink flowers and stood back to take the scene in.
I went back to car and got my phone so take a picture of the sight and to get my sunglasses.
Not because it was sunny...in fact, it was starting to sprinkle, but to hide my eyes. I could feel the tears coming.
I don't cry as much any more. It has been almost 7 years, and the pain is lighter. But there are those moments when I think of her calling Brian a "pill" and commenting on how tall and grown up Robert was becoming. Or when I think of all the phone calls...it least one a day, if not more.
She was my best friend. And I miss her. But I know that she is here with me.
I know that she is proud of my boys and the men they are becoming.
So....I stood there and let the tears roll down my cheeks for a few minutes....I told her I loved her, and turned and walked away because the hurt was just too much that day.
I love you Mom. I miss you! I think about you all the time. I can't wait until the day that I will see you again and I can hug you and tell you that I love you.
MANTI AND MISSIONARIES
We had the opportunity this past Sunday to go to Manti Utah. Some of our dear friends are leaving on a mission. The will be working with the Young Single Adults (YSA/GANS) in Italy on the island of Sicily.
What a wonderful opportunity for them. I am honest when I say it is the type of mission that I would love to go on. Working with the YSA of the church.
It was a great day. We had the opportunity to meet some missionaries that were in Messina and who baptized some people that we know there...and to make new friends.
Good luck Patti and Micheal. We wish you all the best. Buon Lavoro!!!
When we left their home we went by the Manti Temple on the way back. Gio nor Brian had ever been there to see it... It was one of the first temples built in Utah (even before the SLC one...that took 40 yrs). What a beautiful building and such a sweet spirit there as we walked the temple grounds.
And then of course we had to take the fun picture just for Brian....
What a wonderful opportunity for them. I am honest when I say it is the type of mission that I would love to go on. Working with the YSA of the church.
It was a great day. We had the opportunity to meet some missionaries that were in Messina and who baptized some people that we know there...and to make new friends.
Good luck Patti and Micheal. We wish you all the best. Buon Lavoro!!!
When we left their home we went by the Manti Temple on the way back. Gio nor Brian had ever been there to see it... It was one of the first temples built in Utah (even before the SLC one...that took 40 yrs). What a beautiful building and such a sweet spirit there as we walked the temple grounds.
And then of course we had to take the fun picture just for Brian....
THE END OF 6TH GRADE AND ELEMENTARY SCHOOL
What a crazy busy week it was last week.
Brian finished 6th grade. Where did the past 7 years go. Westridge has been such a big part of our lives. We really do feel so blessed that our boys had the opportunity to attend school there.
Brian has had some wonderful teachers and we feel so blessed for the influence they had on him.
Mrs. Morgan, now Mrs. Jeppson was his first grade teacher. She was so sweet. She was in Grandpa Norman's ward when he married Grandma Lorraine, and she came to their wedding on the last day of 1ts grade after school. What a great support!
Looks like she has either shrunk a few inches/feet in the past 5 years....or Brian has grown some.
Thank you so much Mrs. Jeppson for you love, support and smile. We will miss you!
In 4th grade he had Mrs. Dahlquist. She was a great teacher. Young, cute, fun. She made the boys laugh and enjoy school. This is also the year that the "Tres Amigo's" came to be. Brian, Kache, and T* were in the same class and the bonding began!
Then in 5th grade the biggest blessing happened....Carrie Rawlins became Brian's teacher. She was Robert's teacher when he was in 6th grade, and we knew that she would be fantastic. We would always talk to her at school when we saw her, and Robert would go to visit when he could.
Brian was just a little guy in 5th grade. This picture was taken at back to school night the day before 5th grade started in August of 2009. It was a wonderful year!
Carrie...we love you and thank you so much for "everything" that you have done for our sons and our family. We are so thankful for your friendship and feel blessed to have you in our lives.
Brian finished 6th grade. Where did the past 7 years go. Westridge has been such a big part of our lives. We really do feel so blessed that our boys had the opportunity to attend school there.
Brian has had some wonderful teachers and we feel so blessed for the influence they had on him.
Mrs. Morgan, now Mrs. Jeppson was his first grade teacher. She was so sweet. She was in Grandpa Norman's ward when he married Grandma Lorraine, and she came to their wedding on the last day of 1ts grade after school. What a great support!
Thank you so much Mrs. Jeppson for you love, support and smile. We will miss you!
In 4th grade he had Mrs. Dahlquist. She was a great teacher. Young, cute, fun. She made the boys laugh and enjoy school. This is also the year that the "Tres Amigo's" came to be. Brian, Kache, and T* were in the same class and the bonding began!
Then in 5th grade the biggest blessing happened....Carrie Rawlins became Brian's teacher. She was Robert's teacher when he was in 6th grade, and we knew that she would be fantastic. We would always talk to her at school when we saw her, and Robert would go to visit when he could.
Brian was just a little guy in 5th grade. This picture was taken at back to school night the day before 5th grade started in August of 2009. It was a wonderful year!
Carrie...we love you and thank you so much for "everything" that you have done for our sons and our family. We are so thankful for your friendship and feel blessed to have you in our lives.
THANK YOU CARRIE!
WE LOVE YOU!
Sixth grade was an interesting year. Brian had a new teacher, not only for 6th grade, but she was new to Westridge as well. Mrs. Dennis. I think that it was hard for the kids to get use to a new teacher who they weren't familiar with. She was kind and really did her best with the kids and had a sincere desire for them to learn and grow. Thank you Mrs. Dennis for all that you did to prepare the kids for Jr High and what comes next. Thank you for helping them to grow and stretch and realize their full potential.
Brian, Kyle and Mrs. Dennis on the last day of school...Thank you Mrs. Dennis for everything!
Then there is Mrs. Pope. She was Brian's pre-algebra teacher this year. She is wonderful! She was so kind with Brian and so encouraging of him and his abilities. She must be a great teacher, because on his end of year/state testing he received 97% (he only missed one question). Mrs. Pope is leaving Westridge and going to the school district offices. She will be assisting with teaching math teachers how to teach math throughout the district!
And last but not least...Ms Gibbs. She started at Westridge 27 or 28 years ago as a teacher, and has been the principle since Robert was in 6th grade...many moons ago. She has been an amazing principle and really loves every student. She has been such a blessing for the students of Westridge.
THANK YOU GAYE!!!! WE LOVE YOU!!!
Last week was 6th grade graduation. Brian also received his Quest for Excellence Award. There are certain things that you need to do to receive the award. Here is the list as far as I remember:
Read 24 books throughout the year
Do 4 hrs of school service and 4 hours of community service
Participate in some type of extra-curricular activity (ie. sports team)
Participate in the Science Fair, or Storytelling Festival, or Art Expo (Brian did the science fair)
Have healthy living habits (id. diet/exercise/etc)
93% of all home work turned in for the year
90% or higher on all class and homework assignments for the year
Good or higher Citizenship grade for the year.
Two written essays. One about their Quest for Excellence and the other What Their Educations Means to Them.
So you see...the students really did have a Quest for Excellence.
Great job Brian!
Then on the last day of school there was an assembly where different awards were past out to several kids for different accomplishments during the year. The 6th grade teacher's had to choose one student in their class who they thought was an all around great kid for the entire school year, and Brian got the award for his class. What a compliment.
We are so proud of Brian and all his accomplishments at Westridge Elementary. And we are excited for this new chapter in his life as he begins Jr High.
GREAT JOB BRIAN!
WE LOVE YOU
AND
WE ARE SO PROUD OF YOU!
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