LOTS OF THOUGHTS

It has been a busy week with so many different things going on....and now we are getting ready for our 4th of July weekend get-away! Can't wait....Las Vegas is looking better every day...even the heat. Looking forward to lots of time by the pool, a show and dinner out, going to see Eclipse, and don't forget the fireworks! Here is where we will be staying! And it was only $99 for the weekend! We have to sit through a time share presentation, but who cares... get that done Saturday morning and enjoy the rest of our trip. Also I am hoping to catch up with a friend from the mission...Should be a great few days! And we REALLY need the break!

As for all the drama that was going on around me...it feels good to be relieved of it all. I am still concerned about the individuals involved and always will be, but I can't do anything to help and I am just brought down and worn out by it all....so...life goes on and I feel better...I wish "them" the best of luck! I was told by one of "them" that I shouldn't write in my blog about things....my response was..it is my blog...don't read it...trust me there is so much more I could write wanting to, but I try to protect the guilty. This is my space for my thoughts and feelings. Sorry if that thought/comment offends anyone...but like I wrote before, I blog for me.

On a more serious note, I have been thinking about some things lately....here is part of the email that I sent to our missionary son this morning:

I hope you have a had a good week. Most of all I hope that you have had the opportunity to find new people to teach and that your investigators are progressing towards baptism. Ultimately that is the reason you are there right now, "to bring souls unto Christ". What a great responsibility that is. You wear that tag on your heart that has your name on it; Anziano Bona, but it also reads: "la Chiesa di Gesu' Cristo dei Santi degli Ultimi Giorni." So every day you are also wearing the name of Christ.
I have thought a lot about that over the past few days. In church on Sunday Jill Wakefield (Brad's wife) gave a talk in church and she spoke about "the name we bear, or carry". She talked about how as she was growing up her father would tell her to remember to do or not do certain things and then as she became a teenager he explained more saying that she was a representative of the family everywhere she went and the things she did reflected on the family. She likened that to when we are baptized and we take upon us the name of Christ and that all we do and say are a reflection of Him. She also mentioned how we are so lucky, that we don't have to do things alone. Because we have been baptized, we have the opportunity every Sunday to take the sacrament and repent and renew those covenants that we made at the time of our baptism.

It made me think about all the times that I would say to you, "Remember who you are and what you stand for." I know that many times you would laugh at me and think that I was some silly mom...but it is true. If we are remembering at all times who we are and the name that we bear it makes a difference in how we act and what we do and say. I am starting now to use that same phrase with Brian. He took gets a smile on his face and kinda laughs, but as he gets older he will understand even more. So for now I let him smile.
The other thing that I'm trying to work on is during the sacrament to make sure that I am really thinking about the sacrament and what it represents and why we take it. All to often we are busy thinking and doing other things. I want to focus more on the real reason that we go to church...not the social aspect or the fact that "we are expected to go"....Also, something that I can report that I have done everyday since you entered the MTC. Not one night has passed that I haven't prayed before going to bed. Miracle I know! I still need to do better on the morning prayers...but I am really making sure that the night ones are said. I suppose because we go to bed somewhere between 10:30 PM or 11 PM and that is when you are getting up and starting your day....so I figure in a way it is our way to say our prayers together..it helps me feel closer to you! Also, I have really tried to be more sincere in my prayers and show more gratitude for specific things. It has helped me because now I really think about what I am saying when I pray.
I am thankful for your example to me. You having made the choice to serve and doing your best while you are out there has helped to bring back something to me that was missing. Thank you! Thank you for your desire to serve, your willingness, and your example. Also, thank you for the example that you set for your brother. He really looks up to you and wants to be like you. You should see on his facebook status how many times he has written stuff about you how he misses you and how proud of you he is for serving a mission! He is a mini Bona...and we love it!


Some time's we really don't think about the name that we carry everyday...but I am a Clifton, a Bona, and a child of my Father in Heaven, baptized into His church and bear the name of His Son, Jesus Christ. I no longer wear the tag of a missionary on the outside, but I do everyday on the inside....
 
I only hope that I can live my life in such a way that my light does shine forth, and people can see something different in me...
 
The other name that I wear is "I am an American". With it being the July 4th weekend I also want to express the love that I have for this great country of ours. We are so blessed to live in this land. Even if things are not the way people think they should be and even with all of our ups and downs as a nation...we are blessed to have this land and the freedoms that we do have. Every time I hear the national anthem, or see the American flag raised I get a lump in my throat and tears in my eyes. I am proud to be an America and thankful that I was born in this great land. May God bless America and each one of us!