Sky's of blue, and clouds of white...and I think to myself what a wonderful world...somewhere over the rainbow way up high....and the dream that you dare to dream...oh why, oh why can't I?
Is it human nature to think that things are always better on the other side of the hill....like they say, "the grass is always greener" or "somewhere over the rainbow". Why are we never happy with what we have right in front of our face?
I remember when my mother became ill and we slowly started selling some of my parent's belongings, and their house, and trading in cars, etc. I remember after her death thinking yes..she has/had a lot of nice things, but that is what they were "things". Stuff that could be thrown away, given away, or sold. I did keep a few things, but mainly because of the memory that they held for me. I remembered my mother when I looked at certain picture on the walls, or Nick knacks, etc. But more than I anything I have the memories of trips...talks....laughing....our cabin and motorcycles....cruises....Christmas and thanksgivings...birthdays and cakes....dogs, bunnies, birds, redoing my grandmother's home, the mink farm in Pleasant Grove, etc....weddings, babies being born....and all those things that made up who she was and our relationship.
I remember thinking then that the having "sufficient for our needs" was good enough, and that I wanted to make more memories then worry about the big house, the cars, etc...I wanted to make sure that my family knew how much I loved them. I wanted for them to be able to look back and know that I loved them.
However...I am human...and there are days when I would like to be like the Jones' family...the big car, the boat, all the toys, trips, the mansion house, etc. But does that all really matter.
When we die can we take it with us? No...so who cares? I don't see that our boys have suffered any by not having what everyone else has. I have realized that they have so much more than some. They have a mother and father who love them and would and do do anything for them. Our lives are for them. Isn't that what it is all about, really?
I have been asked by some, why don't we move out of our small townhouse, or why have a minivan instead of an SUV? etc. etc. etc....
Well...there are several reasons...one, we can't afford the mansion house...and the toys...we wouldn't know how to use them, and the minivan..well it was free...but most of all, if it isn't broke why fix it? We live in a great neighborhood and a wonderful church ward. We have amazing friends and neighbors. Our kids have great friends and church leaders. Because we have the small townhouse we are able to take the trips, go to movies (our favorite past time), out to dinner, a few Jazz games, and the other small things along the way.
Today I spoke with Ruth...a friend of my mothers from almost 50 years ago. When I was sealed to my parents her husband was a witness at the temple and when Gio and I were married he was a witness there as well. Quentin has since passed away...however, Ruth is still around and when I speak with her I remember my mother and the fun they had and the laughs that we all had together. The times we made Greek cookies, Mexican pastries, homemade ice cream and played Rook at the cabin....those are my rainbows....the memories. I want those same things for our boys. And I think we have a good start.
It was fun to talk to Ruth today. Almost 6 yrs ago mom passed away and she read the eulogy....and I remembered my mom...she felt right there with us.
Brian is happy...Robert is happy...we are all happy...and we have found the other side of the rainbow....
Thank you Ruth for helping me remember what is really important!
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